Very tired.  I need a break from work, I think, but I’m kind of afraid to leave my squirrely new class with a sub until it is better settled.

I wish I could figure out how to pay off my house.  Why is this so hard?

In other news, I’m deciding to adopt the “fake it ’till you make it” attitude and calling myself a writer.  I want to fill out some official form, so I can put it down as my profession.

I’m having a cup of tea and thinking of turning in early. It was that sort of day.  It ended well, though.  My friend brought the children home for me, and I made supper.  I tried to clean the grime out of the bathtub (I was about half successful.) and then I took a shower.

We’ve been talking about the possibility of selling this house and moving because we are unable to refinance it at a reasonable interest rate.  It’s ridiculous.  In June, we will have been in this house for 10 years.  It’s the longest either of us has ever lived anywhere.  It’s true that mowing the grass and maintaining the house is a pain, and that it is kind of a money pit because I am always thinking of projects, but…I like this house.  I like where it is.  I like that it looks like me.  I have rosemary and lavender and roses and jasmine growing here.  It was built in the 70’s, so the bedrooms are tiny and the front hallway opens onto an awkward room that has variously been a living or dining area (it is now both, sort of). I feel like we’ve finally settled into an arrangement that pretty much works for us.  My environment is important to me.  Is it $1400/month important?  Is it 10% interest important?  Is it “poison ivy has attacked my husband again” important?  I don’t know.  Maybe?

I’m pretty decent with numbers, but I don’t have a head for these emotional decisions.  I’m going to sleep on it.